


Until Morning

by Zephyros22



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Also Ahsoka is of legal consenting age in this FYI, Angst, Canonical Character Death, Come be sad with me, Emotional Sex, Explicit Language, F/M, I cried writing this help, Mentions of corpses and bodies, Missing Scene, Season/Series 12, Vaginal Sex, explicit content, i'M SAD, i'm very sad, post season 7 finale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-22
Updated: 2020-08-22
Packaged: 2021-03-07 01:35:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26038804
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zephyros22/pseuds/Zephyros22
Summary: There's a sorrow, a grief which can't be spoken into words that passes between them.Somehow, within it, they find each other
Relationships: CT-7567 | Rex/Ahsoka Tano
Comments: 23
Kudos: 149





	Until Morning

It takes them three days to find and bury the bodies. It's back breaking work. With each chip of the shovel Ahsoka can feel another part of herself breaking. With every brother laid to rest Rex repeats their name, their designation in a silent plea for atonement. 

There's more in the wreckage, somewhere they can't reach. The bodies in the bridge, the ones that had fallen in the lower levels deep within the bowels of the ship rest silently, souls long since passed. Ahsoka can only pray that she's forgiven someday for failing to retrieve the last remains of her men. 

Her men. Her _Verde_. 

Despite everything they were still hers. Her responsibility, her pride, her privilege.

And now, her burden.

Ahsoka cries when they find Jesse. She can't remember if she's ever cried in front of Rex before. The sobs come unabandoned, wracking her smaller frame with the sheer force of it. Her hands cling to her shoulders, as if they could somehow warm her. An unending litany of _"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."_ Fills the air along with the sounds of still dying fires. 

Rex is silent. He lays a hand on her shoulder as she is bent over Jesse's corpse. If Ahsoka looked up she could see that he too had the glimmer of tears in his eyes. The arm holding his helmet trembles from the death grip he curls his knuckles into. 

When Ahsoka's voice runs raw he kneels beside her, not saying a word. He doesn't meet her eyes as he reaches forward and slowly closes Jesse's eyes so that they no longer gaze lifelessly at the stormy sky above. 

He sits with her, waiting for her chest to empty of cries. He doesn't speak, doesn't move. Ahsoka leans into him, and the only way she can tell he's still there is the gentle hesitant arm that wraps around her shoulder.

When she finally cries herself out she inhales and lets the last of her hiccups go in a soft sigh. She makes to stand, to move towards the next body, but Rex's hand stops her.

"That's enough." Is all he says, voice low. Ahsoka can feel his grief then. She can feel the raw emotion behind his words even as he tries to mask it. The way he holds his shoulders, his hand in an almost limp grip on her bracer speaks of an unimaginable sorrow. 

Ahsoka knows then that he can't go on, and neither can she. 

They bury Jesse at the front. His helmet gazes outward, more than a dozen of his brothers behind him. Jesse's trademark custom paint stands in contrast to the helmets around him. Ahsoka looks at the decorations emblazoned on them, a reflection of her own markings. 

These men would have died for her, she knows. They had already killed for her. Now, they had died trying to kill her. Yet she could only feel a bone-breaking despair for their fates. They were born to fight, to die. Their futures did not exist beyond the field of battle, the rain of blaster fire. Now theirs fates had led them to rest in the cold ground of a nameless moon, having fought in vain for a Republic which no longer stood.

Rex knows this too. She can tell. He doesn't speak much during those three days, but Ahsoka can see the anguish lining his features, see it bear down on his shoulders. More than once she catches him standing forlornly over another body, another brother. If Ahsoka looks closely she can see the slight tremble of his shoulders where she thinks he might be crying. Before she can give it too much thought it's gone, and he's pouring soil over the forms of the fallen.

At the end of each day they return to the small camp they have set up next to the bomber. It's little more than a tarp and a fire, doing almost nothing to keep out the frigid wind and smoke. Ahsoka hardly sleeps, images of a burning hangar and of limp forms falling out into the atmosphere haunting her thoughts. There's little reason to take turns with keeping watch. Ahsoka knows inside they both do it because staying awake is better than the nightmares that chase them while they sleep. 

It's only on the third night, after they've buried Jesse, that Rex speaks.

"We have to split up." His voice is a low mumble, hoarse from disuse. He doesn't meet Ahsoka's blue gaze. She can see the heavy bags under his eyes, see the weight in his shoulders. At first his words don't even make sense, and she stares at his confoundedly. 

He looks up, golden eyes gazing at her. 

"We'll be a bigger target if we're together." He explains, and she can hear the fatigue in him, rattling in his chest. "It's safer this way."

Ahsoka doesn't respond at first, merely curls in on herself. The acrid smell of burning starship fuel still fills her nostrils even after several days. Her hands, wrapped around her knees, are caked with dirt and blood. She studies them for a moment, wondering just how many men she's touched since they started to bury the dead.

"Ok." She says at last. The word hangs long in the air. Rex nods once and turns back to the fire, poking at the small flame. he doesn't look at her, yellow eyes glowing from the poor excuse of a campfire. Ahsoka almost wishes he'd say something, anything. Yet she knows that even she struggles to speak, struggles to say the words that she wants to tell him. 

He does speak, surprisingly. Only it isn't what she was hoping. It isn't words of grief, of sorrow, of regret that come tumbling from his mouth. Instead it's a quiet declaration, carrying with it the end of a long fateful journey.

"We'll leave in the morning." He says and falls silent once more.

Ahsoka closes her eyes to quell the rising heartbreak in her chest. A sob pulls at her throat, but she swallows it down. She's tired. The physical exertion of the past few days and the even greater emotional toll drag at her. Her body longs for sleep, but she knows she can't. Sleeping means the screams of her _Verde_ will come back. Sleep means that morning will come, and she will have to say goodbye to Rex. 

She gazes up at the stars. They're partially obscured by thick plumes of smoke and hazy clouds. Still, she can make out some pinpricks of light. They beckon her, upwards into the heavens towards an uncertain future. She briefly wonders if Obi Wan, if Padme, if Cody, if any of her friends and allies also gaze up at the stars now. She wonders if they too wish for morning not to come. 

Her gaze turns to Rex, who has turned away from her. He's perched atop a fallen piece of debris, elbows balanced on his knees. He holds his head in his hands, holds the weight of the world on his shoulders. His back shudders, and though Ahsoka can't hear it, she knows he's crying. 

Wordlessly she stands moves over to him. She places herself beside him, facing in the other direction. As he did before she doesn't speak, merely leans against him as muffled cries shake his shoulders. The motion makes his voice choke out a sob for a moment before he quickly clamps down on it. He leans back against her, their shoulders bumping awkwardly in an effort to stay close. 

She lets him empty himself of cries, lets his chest void of his grief. She feels the way his form trembles as he breathes in raggedly. Slowly his breaths even out as his stifled sobs become quieter. At last he remains silent once more, figure sagging against her. For a moment she thinks he's asleep, having expended all his energy. Then, carefully, he shifts so he can face her. 

His puffy, swollen gaze turns to meet her tired blue irises. His eyes, once focused and full of determination, now look almost pleadingly at her own. They ask a question she cannot possibly answer. 

They're close like this, she realizes. She can feel his exhales tickle her lips, feel his entire side pressed into her. His golden irises have flecks of brown, she realizes. It's something she would have never noticed unless they were at this proximity. She can see the faded pink of scars across his head and face, and for a moment she tries to name them, tries to remember where she was when he received them.

She wants him closer, she realizes. They're already so near each other that it makes it hard to breathe. She wants him even closer, close that she can no longer distinguish her body from his own. 

Rex's eyes flicker for a moment, as if he can see her emotions clearly through her gaze. They soften, stare at her as if coming to a much-needed epiphany. 

She moves first, eyes fluttering shut as she presses forward. She feels him flinch for a moment, and she almost pulls away. The he relaxes, lets the tension ease from his shoulders as he leans forward to meet her halfway. 

His lips are cracked, but she doesn't mind. She lets them settle against her own in a brief, chaste contact. She feels him pause once more, as if debating with himself whether or not to continue. She almost feels him come to the same realization she does. There's no more Grand Army, no Jedi generals, or councils. The only thing that exists in this moment of space and time is the two of them. 

She presses further into the kiss, inexperience bested by enthusiasm. He lets her, his hands fluttering up to her narrow shoulders. Her palms trace the scars of his chest plate, fingers dipping into the shallow slices and grooves of the armor. Rex's lips move against her own, and Ahsoka can feel a stuttering breath as he breathes her in. 

There are no words as his gloved hand comes up to cup the nape of her neck, sliding under her lekku. Ahsoka shudders pleasantly at the touch, lets Rex's fingers trace her blue stripes. She can feel her heartbeat hammer in her chest. She wonders if Rex can hear it, can feel her pulse thrum against the thumb stroking her jaw. 

Another hand comes up, this time to ghost across her chest. Again, Ahsoka feels him pause, waiting for her invitation. She nods against his lips, reaches down, and drags his palm across her left breast. The shape is obscured by her Mandalorian garments, but the contact is pleasant all the same. He rolls her in his hand, and she can't help the small gasp that escapes her. 

Her hands reach behind him, fumble for the clasps of his armor. She knows vaguely where they are, having seen Rex clean his armor several times before. Still she struggles to unbuckle the clasps. He breaks his contact against her lips, releasing the hand from her nape to reach and release his chest plate. It slides away from his shoulders, revealing his under armor. 

Ahsoka takes the moment to shed her bracers, exposing her forearms to the cold air. Rex watches her, eyes tracing her movements in near fascination. Her bare hands return to cup his face. She watches as his eyes flutter shut and she leans to press her forehead gently against his. For a moment they simple exist, allow each other to be in their presence and relish the simple fact that they were alive.

"Are you sure about this?" His voice asks, and Ahsoka can't contain the quiver at his husky tone. She nods once, offering no other words. 

He reaches for her then, truly this time. His hands wrap around her middle as he lifts her to face the same way he does on the rubble. She lets him, lets her hands settle of his forearms. Rex slides off his seat to kneel in front of her, fingers tracing from her thighs down to her calves. He reaches behind her knees and unclasps her greaves. She lifts her legs to help, watching as he slides them off.

She almost laughs when he tucks them neatly beside her, ensuring they won't be freely discarded. The laugh dies in her throat before it fully forms. 

He settles himself in between her legs, taking a moment to look up at her. His arms nearly wrap around her middle. She lets her hands slide to his shoulders, one palm reaching to smear a speck of dirt from his cheek. His gaze is hesitant but wanting, eyes crinkled slightly at the edges in uncertainty. Ahsoka can't help but think for a moment that Rex looks at her like he doesn't deserve her. 

"Ahsoka." Is all he says, almost reverently.

She drags him up to meet her, lips catching on his. As if now acting with permission he surges forward, hand pressing her into the kiss as it splayed across the back of her montrals. She shivers at the contact, her Togruta anatomy sensitive under his touch. Without his armor on she can feel the rigid sinewy muscle under his body glove. Her fingers trace over his chest, his shoulders, anywhere she can touch.

He shudders against her, a low noise echoing in his throat. His head dips as he moves from her lips to her neck, teeth nipping at the skin of her jaw. She has to stifle a cry at how sensitive she is, how his touch sends a heat rushing below her stomach. One of his hands comes to reach behind her, fumbling with the zipper of her top.

She listens to the noise it makes when he finally frees it, letting it slide down her spine. Even the cold metal brushing her skin is enough to make her gasp. He growls against her throat then, a sound usually reserved for battle and asserting rank over his men. Ahsoka's hand comes up to rest against his scalp almost reassuringly. Slowly he works the zipper down until it meets the small of her back. 

He has to lean back to let her shrug off the garment, unable to fully remove the tunic because of the fauld armor on her hips. The fabric pools into her lap, freeing her. Her undergarments remain but do little to guard against the chill or the intensity of Rex's gaze. His golden eyes seem to glow from the fire, and it's all Ahsoka can do not to squirm under his stare.

She consciously lifts an arm to cover her undergarments, knowing he's seen her in nearly less but hesitant all the same. He catches her arm gently, and in a rare moment of tenderness brings her exposed wrist to his lips, mouth ghosting over the space where she can feel her pulse thrumming. It's enough to make her stifle a moan, that heat pooling in her groin. 

Rex leans forward again, lips returning to hers. His hand reaches for the front clasp of her undergarments, and before he can hesitate and ask permission Ahsoka discards the clothing herself. Her exposed nipples quickly hardened at the cold and the noise that escapes her is nothing short of lewd. It seems to spur Rex on, one hand coming to cup her right breast, rolling it under his fingertips. Ahsoka almost keens at the contact, trying desperately to stifle her noises of neediness. 

His other hand traces up her spine, ghosting over her exposed flesh. He dips his head for a moment, and Ahsoka realizes he's examining her growing markings. They're coming in along her sides and spine, curling up under her breasts. It's a mark of maturity, and part of the reason she stopped wearing mid-riff showing clothes. He's never seen them before, and for a moment he traces them with wonder. 

He leans back then, as if to get a proper view of her. Ahsoka doesn't flinch away from her stare this time, and instead meets his golden gaze with her sultry blue eyes. The look on his face is nothing short of needy. His gaze rakes over her body, from the tips of her montrals to her face and downwards. For a moment he looks almost shy. Ahsoka realizes that he's just as inexperienced as she is. 

"You're...so beautiful." He manages, voice choked. 

She reaches for him. She tips his chin so he can meet her eyes again, leaning forward and dragging his lip with her teeth. She can almost feel his heartbeat jump from where her fingers brush against his jaw line. He gasps against her, the noise less a hiss of air and more of a deep wanting sigh. 

"Please, Rex." Is all she says, the words murmured so close they host over his skin. 

Rex nods against her, breath becoming heavy. Ahsoka can sense his restraint weakening with her actions, knows that as much as he doesn't want to hurt her or cross any boundaries he too needs her at the core of his being. He reaches down, unclipping his belt and setting it to the side along with his groin protector and kama. Ahsoka takes the moment to release the clap on her faulds, letting them fall behind her from where she's sitting. 

Rex removes his gauntlets as well as his pauldrons. Ahsoka can see his bare hands now, can see silvery scars along his wrists and knuckles. She can't help herself, reaching forward and catching his hand. She holds his larger palm in both of her own, turns it over and ghosts her fingers over the callouses and still healing scrapes. 

How many times had these hands saved her? She thinks. Exactly how many times had these hands been offered to her in assistance, in concern and fear? Ahsoka doesn't meet Rex's eyes, briefly overwhelmed by emotion. These hands had guided her, protected her, mentored her, served her. Now that they finally could touch her...

Rex's hand closes into a fist in her grasp. Ahsoka felt his other hand come up to cup her face, to brush away a tear forming in the corner of her eye. She looks up at him, sees her own well of emotions reflected in his gaze. There's a sorrow that passes between them that can't be put into words. Within it they somehow find each other. 

He kisses her again, but this time it’s slow, lingering. Ahsoka can almost taste the grief on his lips, lets it settle in her chest. He reaches forward, arms coming up under her thighs. She doesn't protest as he lifts her and repositions them so that she's straddling his form sat on the make-shift seat. The kiss deepens, a raw hunger gnawing away at Ahsoka's patience. She needs him, she realizes. He needs her too, if the stiff bulge in his pants was any indication. 

Ahsoka stops holding his face so she can reach down and shimmy out of her leggings. She realizes with a hot-red flush that she's damp beneath her undergarments. A shudder runs through her before she can stop it. Rex notices, drags her leggings father downwards so they pool around her knees. The hand that had been stroking her montrals deliciously dips to gently, ever so gently, press against her mound. 

Ahsoka nearly keens at the contact, the heat within her stoked by his touch. She should be ashamed of herself, so wanton and completely undone by the contact. Yet she can't bring herself to think past the quench his firm strokes against her bring. His fingers grow damp with the wetness seeping through her underwear, and Ahsoka can hear his breath becoming choked, self-restraint quickly drained at how ready she is. 

She takes his hand in hers, lets it settle against her breast. He makes a muffled sound against her lips that almost sounds like _Ahsoka_. She shivers, all of her muscles coiled with the sensations his contact brings. Pressed against him she can feel the firm broad outline of her chest, breathe in the scent of blaster ion and grenade smoke. His palm against her is rough with the grip of a soldier but gentle with the intention of a protector. Ahsoka closes her eyes for a moment, immersing herself in the presence that is Rex.

Between his boldening touch against her lower lips and the pressure from his touch on her breast Ahsoka feels her patience growing thin. She arches her back into him, relishes in the warmth of his form against the chilled air. Her lips reach up to his ear as she whispers:

"Rex, I'm ready."

Those words alone are enough to send Rex's restraint tumbling down into the depths of oblivion. He nearly growls at her, a low rumbling sound in his throat as he reaches down to free himself. Ahsoka can feel the air of his relieved sigh tickle her shoulders. She lifts herself, knees lifting her up off of his lap as he guides her with his other hand. After a moment Ahsoka can feel him against her, heavy and hard. She reaches down as well, aligning him so he can slowly push into her. 

She gasps at the intrusion, at first pleasant as it parts her lips and then uncomfortable as it presses further inside. She has to grip his shoulders for a moment to center herself. The stretch is borderline painful, and if it weren't for all the blaster shots and broken bones she's suffered during the war she would have cried. She makes a small sound of discomfort and Rex murmurs wordlessly into her skin, rubbing soothing circles into her back. 

He lets her take all the time she needs as she slowly inches her way downward along his shaft. When she's finally seated all of him inside her he shudders violently, briefly overwhelmed by the contact. He makes a choked noise of "A-Ahsoka-" as she experimentally pulses around him. She gives it a moment, let's herself accommodate his girth and allows the pain to subside. 

Then, carefully, she gives a small roll of her hips and groans openly at the way it lights her insides on fire. Rex's hand against her hip flexes with almost bruising force. It's all Ahsoka can do not to come undone at that moment. Rex doesn't move under her, allows her to set her own pace. Yet she can feel his resolve wearing thin, feel the burning desire that rolls off of him through the force. When he bucks his hips up into her reflexively Ahsoka sees stars bloom behind her eyes.

She can feel a faint plea through the force, something that almost sounds like _"Please."_ She adjusts herself so that she can rise off of Rex's member and sink back down. The noise he makes is enough to set a fire within her. He gives a roll of his hips, meeting her as she sinks back down and she keens, the fullness of him so much all at once and yet so good...

They manage to find a pace between them, with her smaller form rising and falling and his strong hips pushing up into her. His arms come to wrap around her, holding her close to his chest as she undulates in his lap. His arms are warm, and guard her against the chill of this unknown moon they find themselves on. Ahsoka buries herself into his chest as she rocks against him, small noises of pleasure pouring from her lips. 

Rex's pace quickens and the noise Ahsoka makes is nothing short of obscene. With each thrust Ahsoka feels Rex touch a part inside of her she didn't know existed, feels it pulse delectably within her. The pure sensation of him filling her, the head of his member bumping against her sends her to heights she never could have imagined. When she can no longer keep his pace, she resigns herself to simply rutting against him, little whimpers of need choking her throat. 

Rex himself stops trying to stifle his small grunts of pleasure, his breath harsh against her. His hand, tucked behind her, comes up to palm her lekku. Ahsoka arches back, and the motion manages to unlock a new type of bliss in her. She tilts her head back into his palm, practically purring at the contact. Rex's breath stutters as she tightens around him, and for a moment it’s all he can do not to finish right then. 

It's too much, all of it too much. Ahsoka keeps chasing after that need inside of her, trying to fan the flames into a roaring inferno but it's not enough. Even as she dips her head to let her lips roll against Rex's it's not enough.

"Touch me." She whispers against his mouth, and she can feel whatever self-restraint that lies within Rex shatter into the force. 

He snakes a hand between them, hips setting an almost punishing pace now, and lets his fingers drag against the peak of her thighs where that bundle of nerves sits. Ahsoka breaks her contact with Rex to throw her head back, the sound in her throat echoing across the small make-shift camp. 

When he growls her name, "Ahsoka..." It's enough to push her over the edge. Reflexively she clamps down on him, feels her walls pulse around him as her orgasm starts from her groin as ripples all the way down to her toes and up to the tips of her montrals. The tightness that had coiled beneath her stomach releases all at once and she nearly cries with relief. 

She sags against him, doesn't even notice as Rex bucks up into her once, twice, three times and breath out a long, choked sigh. Ahsoka feels warmth inside of her and briefly panics before remembering the implant lodged in her arm. Her arms are still hung loosely around his neck, and she can feel his chest expand and sink with every stuttering breath. 

They sit like that for a while. Rex, holding Ahsoka close to him, and Ahsoka settled in his lap, arms draped about his shoulders. Ahsoka wants to speak, want to take the moment to tell him all the things she wished she could, but the words don't come. 

_"I don't want to say goodbye."_ She wishes she could say. _"I've already had to part ways with you once, I don't think I have it in me to do it again. You mean so much to me, you're the only person I have left. I'm not sure I can do this without you. Please don't make me go."_

Rex's hand strokes along her back, almost as if he could hear her thoughts. Ahsoka feels him breathe in more than once as if he's about to speak, but lets it go each time. There's so much unspoken between them, but Ahsoka knows the moment they speak it then the goodbyes that will come to pass in the morning will never happen. For a moment there's nothing more she wants than to let it happen, fate be damned. If she could simply be with Rex for a little longer then it doesn't matter what happens to her. 

She knows she won't allow herself that much. It's too dangerous. Come morning they will part ways, separate for the sake of safety. She'll have to say goodbye once again and let go the only person she has left. 

Rex moves to dislodge her, to readjust but Ahsoka clings to him, her weakness gaining the better of her. 

"Please." She begs quietly. "Just a little longer."

Rex pauses, and then nods once. He moves again, but this time he doesn't let go of her. He holds onto her as he adjusts them both, as he lifts her into his arms and strides over to the small bedroll. He doesn't let go as he lays down beside her, tucks himself around her protectively. Ahsoka curls into him, lets herself be enveloped by his larger frame. 

Rex rubs small circles into her back. Ahsoka feels herself calmed by his steady heartbeat echoing in his chest. She tries to memorize the planes of his figure against her, tries to ingrain the feeling of his hand and his body around her. She wills herself to not forget, to never forget this moment where for a brief second the fear of morning falls away around them. Instead it's just them, two souls against a dark night sky seeking solace from the future within each other's touch. 

_"Nuhoyir jahaala al' verde."_ Rex whispers in Mandoa, the language of his brothers. Ahsoka curls deeper into him, nodding against his chest. She lets her eyes close, knowing that she's safe here in his arms. Even though she'll have to say goodbye tomorrow, for now she can rest peacefully in his embrace.

There are no nightmares for either of them that night. 

In the end morning comes. Ahsoka uses the tattered tarp to cloak herself, let it covers her montrals and face away from prying eyes. There are few words spoken between them, and Ahsoka can't help the grief that aches deeply in her lungs. 

As Rex packs up the remaining supplies she stands in front of the graveyard, gazing out one last time. 

The helmets of her men, her brothers, stare back out at her. Jesse's in front, and the markings of the rest of the 501st behind him. In there are the few men whose names she never got to learn, the ones who sacrificed themselves under her command, nonetheless. She looks over them solemnly, repeating the names she knows and ingraining in her memory the helmets of those she doesn't. 

Rex waits for her, but she knows from his stillness that it's time to leave. 

Ahsoka raises the lightsaber Anakin had gifted her, holds it out in her palm. She tries to memorize the weight and grip of it, this weapon she had wielded against her own men. Slowly she tips her hand, lets it fall. She listens to the sound it makes as it hits the soil at her feet, and she walks away.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi I hope I broke your heart the way Disney broke mine with the season 7 finale :)))))))
> 
> Please remember to leave a kudos and a comment.


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